I would like to preface this by saying that I, myself, am never a difficult person. In fact, I am really not so opinionated that I would EVER try to convince you that I was right, nor would I argue my point of view. Of course not.
I talked to Beth the other night and asked her the secret to subtle manipulation. She thought maybe it had something to do with using phrases like "so what you're saying is...", and other mirroring methods. Sometimes I say phrases like this over and over again, hoping that the person on the other side will say to me: "What I'm saying is that you are so incredibly smart and your point of view is so valid that of course I will do exactly what you want me to do." The day that happens is the day I am buying a lottery ticket.
Sometimes it helps to use your fake voice. Stop pretending that you don't know what the fake voice is-- you've probably used it on me (don't think I can't tell!). But when you use the fake voice, that pleasant, patient, sweet tone that says "I have all day, please, go on telling me about your stamp collection, of course I want to hear", sometimes it actually helps. Sometimes the secret to dealing with difficult people is to smile on the inside so that you can smile on the outside. They never have to know exactly why you're smiling...just paste it on and hope for the best :)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
I've often thought about how to play subtle mind games with people. I lack patience though and end up saying "Yeah, you all ready told me that". I like the idea of being able to smile on the inside for other reasons, I just have to make sure it doesn't end up looking like a grimace once it reaches the outside.
This is a great reminder to be patient with people. I think Dad was always very good about that. I don't ever remember him getting upset or blowing up at anyone no matter how much they tried his patience. I have found that there are certain people I know I need to be more patient with and I go into any conversation with them with that in mind. Thinking about how patient God is with me helps sometimes when it's difficult to be patient with others.
OK, that's all I have to say. I hope your presentation goes well today...I'm praying for you with that.
this was really funny, Sarah---it's like putting a narrative on that cartoon that I can't think of the name---about working in a cubicle with a clueless boss---anyway, I think anybody can identify--I'm going to be listening for your fake voice the next time I'm telling one of my long involved stories....:) You have to put up with me because I'm your MOM!
Post a Comment